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Be Silly. Be honest. Be kind.
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

Men & Women - We're Just Different


By Marnie L. Pehrson

I don't care what anyone says - you can claim we're equal all day long - but I'll never agree that men and women are the same. We're distinct from day one. We're born different and here's 5 evidences to back up my theory.

The Shirt

Ever notice how a woman takes her shirt off verses how a man takes his off? A woman crosses her arms in front of herself - the left hand grabbing the bottom right side of the shirt and her right hand grabbing the bottom left side of the shirt, and pulls it gracefully over her head in the same direction as her hair flows. What about a guy? He reaches back behind his neck with both hands and yanks the shirt off over his head, mussing his hair as he goes. This is not taught. I have five children and the girls all take their shirts off the ''woman way'' and the boys all take theirs off the ''guy way.'' And no one ever taught them how to do this. Why did God make women pull their shirts off the way they do? Think about it men, how provocative would it be if your wife yanked her shirt off by the scruff of the neck and drug it over her head dragging her hair down into her face? Real seductive - eh? So much for multiplying and replenishing.

Communication

How many men do you know who can spend 3 hours on a telephone call and never get bored? How many women do you know who can do this and then pick up the phone and talk to another friend for another couple hours and think she had the best day ever? Women solve their problems by talking them through, around, over and under. Men get to the point; after all there's a football game on. The scariest thing you can tell a man is ''Let's talk.'' And his classic reply is, ''How long is this gonna take?''

Multitasking

Have you ever tried to talk to your husband while he is on the phone with someone else? ''Huh - wha? Can't you see I'm on the phone here?!'' On the other hand, how many women do you know who can diaper a baby, check her email, talk on the phone and braise a roast at the same time? Women are made to multitask. Men are like Charles Emerson Winchester III on M.A.S.H., ''I do one thing at a time, I do it very well, and I move on.''

Analyzing

Women over-analyze everything - most especially relationships. After a date, a woman gets on the phone and calls her best friend, going over the date blow-by-blow. ''First he did this, then he said that, and do you think he really likes me or do you think he's leading me on?'' The guy goes home, props up his feet in the recliner and flips channels for the rest of the night - never thinking another thing about the date, much less about anything that even remotely resembles a relationship. A piece of advice for all my single sisters out there -- stop wondering, ''Is he really thinking this when he said that?'' I'll let you in on a secret I've learned after living with my man for the last 15 years. When left to their own devices, men only think about 5 things: food, sex, sports, work, and their hobby (which could be a repeat of one of the previous four). That's it. Forget relationships, forget overanalyzing. I'm telling you, those five things are it.

Nurturing

Have you ever seen how a little boy carries a baby doll versus how a little girl carries one? As young as 18 months old, my daughters gently cradle their baby dolls lovingly in their arms. Give one of my boys a baby doll and he grabs it by the hair of the head, dangling it as he runs through the house, beating it on chairs as he goes. Now, mind you, nurturing and affection are two different things. My boys are actually much more affectionate than my girls, but the desire to nurture (a.k.a. mother-hen, boss and control) is definitely a girl thing.

Ok, that's it. Have I just laid the groundwork for a bunch of hate mail or have I convinced you? We're different aren't we? As Les (Jessica Lang's father) said in Tootsie, ''hens don't try to be roosters and roosters don't try to lay eggs.'' We each have our strengths that compliment each other. Why don't we stop trying to be ''more of the same'' and start appreciating each other for our unique differences?

(Note to anyone tempted to correct me: Please, this is just a tongue-in-cheek article. Don't write me and tell me you, your husband or wife don't fit these rules. I know there are exceptions. Lighten up! You're talking to a woman who hates to shop, is inept at decorating and who is married to a man who lives at Sams, Wal*Mart and Bi-Lo and who brings home paintings and knickknacks for the house that he buys from women at work. If it were up to me, the walls would be bare and we'd all be eating at computer desks.)

About the Author: Marnie is a writer and developer of highly interactive niche-based Web communities. Her automated tools make it easy for you to have an interactive, content rich site that's easy to maintain. Find 1,000's of articles on dozens of topics for your web site, newsletter or publication at http://www.ideamarketers.com

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