By Jean M. Johnson I have always been told that children are a blessing, and teens are showing their independence, as they become adults. The big question here, is what is a pre-teen? My oldest daughter is eleven, and in many ways a very independent person, yet in other ways, I still see signs of the little girl she once was. With her, I have crossed the threshold of being a person who knows everything, as my younger children still see me, to having forgotten everything I have ever learned. My daughter and I were having a conversation recently, more accurately; I was conversing, while she was rolling her eyes at me. The topic of conversation: current clothing styles. From our discussion, I learned that I am: 1) A relic with absolutely no taste, 2) Completely out of touch with reality. 3) Totally clueless about what is proper attire for women of today 4) Last, but not least, I learned that I was old and set in my ways. Now out of that list, the first three items, I expect. It is normal for a person to think of their parents as such. The one I have the problem with is number four. When did I become OLD? I am only 32 years of age. I am still in my prime and have a long way to go before I need that old rocking chair. I have begun to believe that a pre-teen’s goal in life is to make you question yourself on everything that you do and say. When a child reaches that age, you can no longer give a brief explanation to answer their questions. It is never enough. As they learn more, they cause you to wonder in amazement, did I actually learn anything when I was their age, or was all of my education a figment of imagination? A prime example of this is, my nine-year-old daughter asked me to help her with a math problem. During the course of explanations I was providing, the eleven year old kept coming in and saying, “Mom, you have the basic idea, but they don’t do it that way anymore, now, in these modern times, it is done like this.” She then proceeded to show the nine-year-old how to do it. This event caused me to sit back and take a mental inventory of myself. Now, when I was in third grade I know I learned to do that problem, but how in the course of the years did my methods of finding the answer become antiquated? It all had something to do with the terminology I believe. Kids no longer regroup by borrowing or caring over; trading now does it all. Do different words mean that my methods make it wrong? Well, I tested the theory, and thankfully got the same answer as the eleven-year-old, which I promptly tried to show her and gloat. In return, I got a blank stare and another session of eyes rolling upwards. “Mother, I understand that your answer and my answer came out to be the same, but the way we get the answer is much more efficient and time saving now.” She had the nerve to tell me. I am beginning to think I know what the answer to my question is. A pre-teen is Mother Nature’s version of a very complex logic puzzle. Something that you can ponder on for years and never quite get the solution. A pre teen can also be a kind loving person as mine showed me the other day. She asked if she could go do something with her friends, I told her no. After I had to explain my reason, she lovingly placed her hand on my shoulder and said, “ It’s ok Mom, I understand, for you are old and set in your ways.” ABOUT THE AUTHOR: I am a stay at home mom, with 4 wonderful daughters. love to write as a hobby, but wouldnt mind writing for a living. I have been married for 12 years, so having survived 12 years of marriage, and four daughters, i have a fine tuned sense of humor. |