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By Karen C. Driscoll
The top ten ways to tell you’re a
mother of small children (in case you hadn’t noticed
yet):
1. You wish Steve’s replacement
was Fabio.
2. You know who Steve is in the
first place.
3. You actually got a shower
today- when your one year-old spit the antibiotics
she was
supposed to swallow, all over your face, your hair,
your arms, your legs, your feet…
4. Your manicurist is a four year
old wielding a fuchsia magic marker. Now you’re
color-coordinated with a spot on your new rug, a
squiggle on the wall, and a large pink "H" on the
table.
5. It took you only twelve hours
realize that you were wearing your shirt backwards,
and only seconds more to ascertain that it was
inside-out as well.
7. On a weekly basis you are
instrumental in assisting a pile of laundry to grow
to heights never before thought possible.
8. You narrate your actions out
loud, refer to yourself as "mommy", and frequently
use multiple hyphenated words such as poo-poo,
pee-pee, bye-bye, night-night and sweetie-sweetie-snookum-pie
in serious sentences.
9. Your Tupperware is as likely to
contain moldy leftovers (compliments of you) as it
is to contain millipedes, earthworms and pill bugs
(compliments of your son).
10. You laughed (hysterically)
today when your husband told you he’d be home late
(again). You cried when after yelling at your
daughter and apologizing, she brought you a bouquet
of wilted dandelions and said "That’s OK mom, I
still love you."
About the Author: Karen
Driscoll is the mother of four small children. She
can be reached at KMHBRDRISCOLL@hotmail.com |
