Kid Code of Honor
"Hey all you parents out there! Wondering why your kid
wont eat spinach? Why he deliberately disobeys you? Well
look no further than the Kid Code of Honor (swiped from
the rooms of my little ones)."
TO QUALIFY AS A KID YOU
MUST:
- Dislike veggies,
especially leafy green ones, and try to get away with
sticking them to the bottom of the table (I currently,
along with crayon marks and the odd toy, have several
pieces of food underneath the table and wedged behind
cupboards)
- Never listen to
parents, deliberately climb on furniture, draw on the
walls, hit your sister, etc. after we parents have told
them a million times to not do it.
- Have REALLY bad manners
(self explanatory, also see rule 4)
- Hate fine dining and
always behave terrible at a restaurant. The fancier and
quieter it is, the louder and more bad mannered you should
be. <continued below>
- Always sing annoying
songs when stuck in the car with parents. Some personal
favorites of mine include; The Song That Never Ends, 99
Bottles of Beer, and any song which, sung over and over
again, will lead to threatening to pull the car over
(think: Christmas songs in July, toilet version).
- Always make HUGE messes
and refuse to clean them up and get REALLY dirty when
playing.
- Make sure to annoy mom
even more whenever she is in the shower/bathroom/talking
on the phone/etc. Whenever I answer the phone it is always
"Who is it? Who is it?" "Can I talk to him/her" or
complaints about hitting siblings or requests for help
pouring orange juice.
