First of all let me tell you, I am so grateful for my seven children and their sometimes idiotic behavior. Yes, their behavior coupled with mine makes this blog possible on a weekly, sometimes daily, basis.

Our morning adventure starts at 6 a.m. with all five of the little kids getting up, ready for school, breakfast eaten and chores complete by the 7:24 bus arrival. It is our first year experiencing the bus and so far so good. The kids love the social time with their newly made friends and although last week we had two near misses with them and the bus, nothing happened quite like it did this morning.

You see, after they are picked up Emma has a whole 24 min. before her bus arrives to get her to school. Her school seems to be eons away from our house in the middle of nowhere and therefore I am absolutely sure that she is ready and waiting on time. A task not too daunting considering she has an extra 24 min. (almost a half of an hour for those of you not clear on this) to catch her bus. Typically this is the time I sit down and do one of the many "made for t.v." hairdo's she's got waiting for me up her sleeve. Today, however, I was midway through loading the dishwasher when the little kids walked out the door and while finishing up, Emma and I chatted. Near the end of my loading and her chatting I noticed her hair wasn't brushed out after her shower. I let her know that she needed to do that before I started at work on her hair. Off she went to brush out her hair when Tait started to get fussy. I tried to occupy his starving self with his exersaucer and toys while Emma brushed and watched. Finally, giving that idea up I told her to hold him while I did her hair. Glancing at the time, I noticed we only had 10 min. and proceeded to ask her what the style was going to be today. She told me three French braids on the top of her head back into a messy pony tail. I start to work parting and braiding. and get about halfway through one braid when in comes Liz and baby Paisley (great name huh?) who I am watching. I have a brief conversation with Liz before she's out the door and look at the clock. OK, I have 2 French braids to go and only 5 min.

I think to myself "fast fingers, Hunt!" I mean c'mon that's doable right? I'm all warmed up from doing 3 other girls hair already this morning, it should be NO PROBLEM! RIGHT? ....WRONG! I finish up right when I hear the bus pull away. OOPS! But oh well, their is only about a dozen other stops in our neighborhood, we'll just catch up to the bus I think to myself and tell Emma to grab a baby and her backpack and jump in my pimped out van! We load in about 3.4 seconds flat and barrel out of the driveway. I mean, we were so fast that P.D. had snuck in with us and I didn't realize it until we were on our way up the street.

So far, I'm sure you're thinking it sounds like this is my personal retardation getting us into this mess and yes, maybe I have a big part in all this fiasco up until now but hold on, hold on keep reading I promise you this turns out to be one of those "kid things" that you just have to shake your head and wonder!

I have never ridden Emma's bus, I have not personally called the transportation center and asked for a route map and therefore, I have NO IDEA where the bus stops before it reaches it's destination at her school. So, I say to Emma "OK, tell me exactly (note the emphasis on the word exactly here) where your bus stops so I can drop you at one of the next stops". She says "OK, go up, up, up the hill here" as I drive she says "OK, there's a stop......here's another stop.....uuuhhh....that right there is another one....OK, turn here....." I'm thinking "good, god this bus driver drove fast to get that far ahead of us!" and I keep driving when I turned she said "oh, is that my bus? in the church parking lot?" I assume, with her wondering if that was her bus that for some reason it stops at the catholic church before heading out onto the main street, so I pull in just as she says "hmmm... wonder why it would stop here today!" SERIOUSLY?? I just pulled in here because you saw a bus, !
not because yours actually stops here on a daily basis?

When I calmly say "Emma, c'mon tell me where your bus goes from here" she says "the saddle rock apartments" OK, those are quite a ways away and what I didn't mention before was that I am in no position to be driving all over town! Let me explain further....

number one: I am out of gas. After running errands for hours yesterday and Tait almost ready for a bottle I chose to go straight home with the thought in mind that the next outing I had I needed to leave 20 min. early to get gas. Obviously not knowing my next "outing" would be to chase down a school bus. Plus, in my hurry...I didn't bring my wallet!!!

number two: I wore Josh's pajama pants to bed last night... Uhh...think about that for a minute I am 4'11", he is 6'3" the pants are like two feet longer than I am and I have to cinch them up to get them to hang very loosely on my hips. It's not a fashion statement by any stretch, but they are very cozy!

number three: I have on a white tank top and no bra....NO BRA PEOPLE!

number four: In my mind I will be running out of gas and I realize I have two babies and a dog. No problem, if you have a leash and a stroller with you...but do I? OH NO, NO I absolutely DO NOT!

number five: I did not bring my cell phone with me. Well, that's really not a problem, Emma has hers right? UHHH...wrong! she left hers at the house too!

I'm sure I had a million other reasons why I should not be chasing a bus all over town, but those are the ones that are continually running through my head as my daughter is having me "tour" the surrounding areas on this fine Wednesday morning. Off I go down Arapahoe road...because that's where the next stop is remember? Remember, the next stop is in Saddle Rock? Wrong assumption AGAIN...because as I am sitting at the first traffic light thinking of all the ways this can be going from bad to worse Emma's bus pulls out of our neighborhood right behind me. WHAT? I say "Emma, I thought the next stop was at Saddle Rock?" she says "well ya...AFTER it hits the stops on that last street over there" OMG! So, now, I am going to run out of gas, with 2 babies and a dog, with pants that are two feet too long, without money or a bra and no cell phone to call for back-up because my tour guide is withholding information?!?! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME! As I verbalize this (in the calmest !
possible way) I notice Emma sitting way forward in her seat like this is a totally fun little adventure to her! I mention my frustration with the fact that she's acting like this is a "joyride" and yet, her baby brother is starving and now cranky, I'm in no position to be driving all over town and that this is absolutely not going to happen again and the next time....wait!......is she laughing at me? WHY, yes, she is! Needless to say, I was not happy with her by the time we got to the next bus stop and caught her bus. I did make it home without any of my worst nightmares coming true.

My plan for an uneventful, relaxing morning watching two babies play with toys while I sipped hot tea had turned into Mario Andretti vs. the school bus. I guess this is what makes life so appealing though isn't it?




Ambyr Hunt is a mother of six kids and 3 dogs who lives in Mt. Pleasant, SC. By focusing on the humor of child rearing, she's managed to stay sane...or has she?
Email: ambyr @ me.com