Relationships Top 10

by Laurie Neal

Love can be great; but it can also be difficult. We all make mistakes. Let these Top 10 lists serve as a friendly reminder of what does, and does not, make for a great relationship.

Top 10 Do's

1. Do let your partner know that they are appreciated and loved. Make the time each day to let them know.

2. Do take the time to nurture your relationship - by each taking time for yourself and spending time alone together.

3. Do be honest with your feelings. Let your partner know how you are feeling. 4. Do take your partner's feelings seriously.

5. Do listen when your partner talks to you. I don't mean be quiet until you have a chance to break in with your side - I mean really, truly listen and hear what your partner is saying.

6. Do let go of the past and learn from your mistakes.

7. Do give your partner the benefit of the doubt.

8. Do take a time out when things get heated and watch your words. You don't want to say anything you'll regret later.

9. Do agree to disagree sometimes. Compromise when possible, but expect to have differing opinions sometimes.

10. Do keep some things private. Not every friend and family member needs to know all the intimate details of your relationship.
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Top 10 Don'ts

1. Don't nag. There is no quicker way to annoy someone. Chances are they will just learn to tune you out.

2.Don't talk over your partner, twist their words, tease or tell your partner that they are wrong - guaranteed communication killers.

3. Don't give your partner the silent treatment. If you don't talk it out, the situation will never be solved.

4. Don't storm away when you want your partner's attention. Your partner may not follow - then you'll only feel worse.

5. Don't fight dirty. Being nasty and saying things you really don't mean will only make the situation harder to resolve.

6. Don't hold in your feelings until you exploded. Dealing with one problem at a time is much easier than dealing with several at once.

7. Don't be stubborn. If you are wrong - admit it. If your partner apologies - accept the apology graciously.

8. Don't drag others into your arguments. You don't want your mother in your bedroom - she doesn't belong in the middle of your marital problems either. Your friends may say things meant to help, that will only bother you once the dispute is over.

9. Don't put off spending quality time together. You wouldn't do that to your kids - why would you do it to your partner?

10. Don't refuse professional help when you know you need it. It can be embarrassing to see a relationship counselor - but you'll get over it, and if it helps, isn't a little embarrassment worth it?

Written by: Laurie Neal, Connecticut lneal@bestweb.net
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